I was in yoga class last winter and the instructor was reading a phrase that resonated through my body.
You know how sometimes you hear a certain song or hear a specific phrase and you just know it must be for you?
Well, this was it.
I went to this class weekly, and it seemed as though the instructor said this multiple times in a month. “Ok, ok, You have my attention, Lord”.
Each time, the energy through my body became stronger.
So much so, that I found a photo of it and have it saved on my phone.
This was something I needed to remember.
“A Lighthouse doesn’t go around the island looking for boats to save, it just stands there shining “.
I get it now, God….and I give thanks.
“Watch for the Lighthouse “.
I found “her”, in a most unexpected way.
Quiet, steady, and bright.
I already knew of her Light and have blessed to be encompassed with it, in an even deeper way, the past 8 months.
I dedicate this to my dear friend, Jul. ♥️
She was the lady at the front desk at my office that I laughed with, cried with and shared daily life with for almost 16 years. I often said she knew me better than my hair stylist…and they seem to know a lot about their clients. Haha.
She watched my children grow up, she was a constant through my divorce.
She had a front row seat to the love story that Brian and I created.
And through it all, she just stood there….Shining.
I’ll be honest, I sometimes took her for granted.
….Until the day we realized our time with her was becoming limited.
I still remember sitting with her, shortly after she found out she was ill.
She said, “ I just can’t believe you are here”. I was baffled by that. I said, “Jul, why wouldn’t I be? I am showing up for you the way you did for me all these years.”
I can only hope she knew the mark she left on this world and the people around her.
Let me tell you a bit about her Light.
She made birthday cakes for my husband every single year.
She almost flew out of her chair with joy every time she told a story of her kids or grand babies.
She exuded happiness whenever anything good happened to anyone.
She was loyal.
She was honest.
She was true.
She was Light.
In the beginning of her journey, I wanted to find a way to give her something to hold onto. I guess it was my way of “giving back” to her for all she had done for me.
I was signed up to run a marathon in May of this year, but due to the pandemic it was delayed. In December, as we laughed and reminisced, I asked her to make a promise to me.
I asked if she would meet me at the finish line of the marathon on May 3,2020. She promised to be there. We even made a pinky promise.
With Jul, you knew a promise she made to you was worth more than gold.
That promise we made to one another gave me more power than I knew. To do things I didn’t think I could.
She was a warrior and I knew she would fight for that date.
And she did……and surpassed it by almost 2 more months.
Her strength and determination was humbling.
We sure had fun cheering one another on. Our motto became a staple of our daily text messages. “You fight and I’ll Run”.
And on we went.
I endured cold runs and she endured grueling chemo.
She spent 6 days in the hospital and I ran 12 miles per her request.
We shared prayers, songs of joy, and what I found in her will remain a part of me forever.
Her belief in Jesus deepened my Faith.
I watched another human let go and allow His mighty hand guide her Life.
I witnessed the absolute Peace and Trust she had put in her Savior.
And I can’t say that I have ever been so blinded by another soul’s Light.
For those who truly knew her heart, they would agree.
An Instrument of God.
I believe we all are instruments…and as Bette Midler sang, “we are instruments, marching in a common band”.
He is the composer and coordinates it all.
Who you encounter, where you go…all a part of the masterpiece.
To live a life is a blessing to one.
To live a life that gives life to another is a blessing to many.
That was my Jul☀️
To put into words how her time here touched others is more difficult than I thought it would be.
It’s too extraordinary. Too beautiful. Too big for a blog or a book.
To watch another soul encompass the darkness of pain and fear in absolute peace and Light is something I cannot describe.
All I know is that her life changed mine.
It changed my heart.
The way my eyes view the world and others around me.
My heart will always miss her wonderful laugh, her giving personality, and her lighthearted stories.
However, I believe nothing will ever dim her LIGHT☀️
Rest In Peace, dear friend.
And thank you 🙏 for sharing a part of your world with me🌈
I’ll see you on my next run….I know you will be right beside me.
We are instruments of love and peace, here to learn and help guide one another to be our best selves.
And as Juls last message to me says,
“Always keep the Love of Jesus in your heart”.
Don’t waste a moment waiting to LIVE, friends. LIVE by faith, not by sight.
And always, always see everything through the lens of LOVE 💕
Much love to all,