I never knew what it felt like, living with the day to day chaos during childhood.
I couldn’t imagine being able to harness it during the time I was raising my beautiful babies(4 children all under the age of 6, and running a daycare).
And, I just knew that once I ventured into a real estate career, it would be unattainable.
It’s called Balance.
And, man oh man, was I wrong.
I have it!
And you can too.
Balance is defined as “An even distribution of weight, allowing an object (or person) to remain steady and upright”.
Now, think about that for a moment. There are 2 key words. STEADY And UPRIGHT.
Once I regained my Balance in life, I guess that is how I started to feel.
Steady. And upright.
I recall attending a seminar of some sort, about 4/5 years ago with a friend.
It was a women’s business conference or something similar.
The keynote speaker was there to talk to us women about Balance and how to handle all the roles we juggle everyday.
She was very visual. Changing hats to show how many times we as women change our roles throughout the day.
I know I certainly do!
I used to joke about being “Superman” ,without a phone booth, as I’d run home to change into my volunteer outfit, then back into my Realtor suit, then to soccer mom garb, and who knows what else!
I listened intently, as I believe my friend invited me for a reason.
You see, I was way off Balance.
I was eating poorly. By that, I mean, coffee for breakfast, maybe chips and ice cream for lunch around 3pm, and then out that night. A chaotic mess.
I was also close to my all time highest weight. My clothes were a mixture of “too tight” muffin top pants and big shirts to cover the muffin. And, I had more scarves and shoes then any human should. You know, because the shoes and scarves still fit.
I was getting up late, showing up to appointments late, forgetting my children’s events and royally screwing up my to do lists.
But, most importantly, I remember just feeling EMPTY.
Always chasing and running and feeling like there wasn’t any substance or purpose in my day.
Now, all you moms out there, and dads too.
I know I struck a chord.
Life in 2017 in insane.
Social events, media, “keeping up with the Jones’s”, careers, children, dinner, cleaning the house, the Holidays, family, and the ever dreaded laundry!
I hate laundry, by the way.
It’s this never ending demon.
You wash, dry, fold and what the hell?!?!?
I know…you know… what I mean.
When and where is there time to breathe?
Well, you have to MAKE the time. 💜
About 3 years ago, I hit a point where my mental and physical health became a priority.
I started putting myself first.
Well, most days, it was about just keeping a promise to my soul that I would take 1 hour to “heal” me.
Now, that could be whatever worked that week.
Maybe I bought a new candle, took a bath that night, or took a moment to listen to a song I liked, in the garage, before going inside.
And, I know what you’re thinking now…but, I feel guilty.
If we only knew then what we know now.
Screw the guilt. Screw it.
As with anything, it gets easier as time goes on.
We, as adults, devote ourselves to others all day long.
To our families, our friends, our jobs.
Why don’t we feel we deserve one on one time with our own souls?
I’ll tell you this, friends.
I stopped feeling guilty and started investing in myself first.
I begin at 3:43am, to be exact.
And it is amazing.
No one to text or call back.
No laundry to rotate.
No groceries to unload.
And the best thing? No guilt.
I mean, who the hell needs anything at 3:43 am?!
Most of the world is still fast asleep.
It took some practice and a bit of discipline… and commitment….and coffee ☕️, but I have mastered it.
And, now, I look forward to it!
I do some of my most creative work at that time. I solve issues at that time.
And I love myself FIRST at that time.
Now, it’s not for everyone.
But the message I am trying to send is this….
In order to find balance, we must make a distinct mental note as to what to put first each day.
I have learned that I am most optimal when I choose ME first.
I am a better mama, wife, friend, Realtor, coach, writer and mentor.
And I like me best when I am centered and in balance with who God has designed me to be.
I want you to do something beautiful the moment you are finished reading this.
I want you to write down 5 new ways to LOVE yourself and take care of your soul 🦋
Go get the paper and pen now!
I’ll wait 😉
Now, today/tonight…before you go to bed, choose 1 and do it.
Inhale the peace and love.
Smile and enjoy.
Now, tomorrow, pick another off that list and
Fill your bucket First and watch your life, and those around you…..CHANGE.
“It’s what’s for dinner”…or lunch..or breakfast.
Take back control of your life, friends.
Make today about YOU.
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